Paul Ryan Turns Stand-Up Comic with Wacky 'Mean Tweets'

House Speaker Paul Ryan has released a video in which he reads vicious "mean tweets" about himself, including one in which he’s called the human version of "a pair of pleated khakis."

The Wisconsin lawmaker joined the "mean tweets" phenomenon – a regular feature on Jimmy Kimmel’s late night show – to rediscover "our common humanity as a way to restore civil discourse and strengthen civil society," his office says.

On the video, which is sweetened by a laugh track, Ryan is seen reading looking at his cellphone and reading from his Twitter feed.

"Paul Ryan could be a live action Disney villain. #WidowsPeak," he reads, grimacing and then adding, "They used to call me Eddie Munster, so not too much of a stretch."

Next is, "Paul Ryan is proof that you don’t need a spine to do P90x," referring to the famous home exercise routine.

Then he’s lambasted in a tweet for recently revealing that woodchucks had dined on parts of his automobile: "Woodchucks eating Paul Ryan’s car gives me hope for the future."

Another tweet says: "I want to high five Paul Ryan’s face with a shovel. Just hard enough to make him see birdies. Hate that smug look." After Ryan reads that one, he makes a smug face.

Next: "Paul Ryan is the kind of guy who crashes your kegger, drinks all your beer, and then calls the cops to make a noise complaint."

"Pretty good idea," he quips.

He concludes with, "Paul Ryan is what it would be like if a pair of pleated khakis became a person."

"I haven’t worn pleated khakis in at least six months!" Ryan protests.

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